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Athena Heart of Gold

She was deep in a heavily sedated sleep.  She hadn’t slept so deeply in months or even what seemed like ages.  However long, it was now warmly relaxing – an enormous relief.  Then, in the sedated but exhausted sleep, her breathing accelerated as her lungs valiantly pumped harder and deeper attempting to oxygenate and press onward a heart that was being stopped by the paralyzing agent flowing in her veins from the prick of the vet’s needle.


One moment there was breath and life; the next instant all was still.  All was quiet.  She was released.  She was no longer burdened with a body that refused to allow her youthful spirit to thrive.

She brought unconditional acceptance, undying loyalty, and unquestioning forgiveness.  She brought joy.  Her eyes were always full of youthful joy.  Even when youth fled and the body betrayed her, she continued to look out on the world with eager eyes of youth.  In her mind’s-eye she never aged.  She always saw life with the eager, whimsical and inquisitive eyes of youth.  It wasn’t until the last few weeks that the eyes began to dim and show the effects of the lingering pain.

All is quiet, very still.  As new consciousness emerges, awareness begins to take shape.  Her human was wretched with a bottomless torrent of tears.  Yet, she was at peace.  Surly, her human didn’t understand.  Of course not, he had not passed over and remained confined.   

She on the other hand was free and at peace.  Free to explore.  Free to follow each intriguing scent to its origin.  Free once again to run on stumpy legs with ears flopping and tail circling like a propeller, all in an unabashed display of the delightful pleasure of being.  She was now free to bark for its pure pleasure.  Free to chase to her heart’s content, the trespassing squirrels and interloping birds.  Forever free, yes free – free to be.

If we own pets, we are going to have to deal with end of life issues. Those of us, who have formed a relationship with an understanding vet well in advance of the inevitable, are most fortunate.  I give my greatest appreciation and gratitude to Dr. Mary Coker of Smoky Mountain Mobile Veterinary Services whose understanding presence was invaluable at the time I needed her most. 

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